I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
