You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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