Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You ruined the universe
Randomize