I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Alive.
So much puke
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
