its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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