She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
