It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Randomize
