she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
