i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Randomize
