your parents love me but you hate me
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
She swung at the pinata with crutches
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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