Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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