if i died would you start the facebook group?
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Randomize
