you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
