porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
