I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
