No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
