it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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