Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
