Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
