we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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