Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Randomize
