About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
