wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
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some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
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It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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