Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize
