Yo dont text me then not text me
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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