i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
