the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize