I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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