all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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