I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
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