that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Randomize
