I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Such a big mess for such a small penis
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
