im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize