True but thats because hes a fetus.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
