Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Randomize