You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
