We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
i've created a new STD.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
