I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Randomize
