do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize