Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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