he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
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