Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
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