did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
This toilet bowl is my home.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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