He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
