I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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