Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
