Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
