i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
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