I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize
