If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize