she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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