i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Rumble strips road head = magical
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
